Reviews & Recommendations

RJ Hesketh, Director of Discipleship & Education

“You should never judge a book by its cover.”

An old cliche to be sure, but cliche or not, it is usually true. In terms of “The Christian Husband” by Bob Lepine, I would take that notion a bit further and add that you should not judge a book by your own skepticism.

I have to admit when Pastor Joshua added this particular volume to my study and review list I took one look at it and assumed that I already knew everything I needed to about it. There was no doubt in my mind that the author would go one of two common directions. Either he would be preachy and lofty, excluding the down and dirty reality of marriage and replacing it with biblical idealism. Or he would subject me to a watered-down self-help mess, devoid of any real biblical truth. In my mind, at the time there was no in-between. I could not have been more wrong.

As it turns out Mr. Lepine had written something very different than my expectations could have anticipated. From page one, this book is designed not only to educate the reader but to engage them as well. It addresses the reality of the struggles and failures inherent in being a husband while at the same time unapologetically holding them up against the biblical standard.

“The Christian Husband,” is broken into three main sections each with several chapters that tease out the primary theme of that section. It opens with the dialogue of an interview for the position of husband. In the back and forth we begin to see that the applicant, though excited about the position, is woefully ill-prepared to execute or even understand what duties are expected of him. This interview theme runs throughout the book and allows the reader to continually return and recalibrate as new ideas are placed before them. At the end of each section, we are given a list of questions to consider before we move on to the next section. This allows the reader to move from passive reader to active learner, fully engaged with the material.

Now for the big question. “Is this book only for husbands?” I would have to answer that question with a resounding "NO". Though married Christian men may be the initial focus of this book, much like the Scriptures, the initial audience and the total audience are not the same.

I would recommend this book to several different categories of people. The first is obviously men who are currently married or about to be married. But we should consider the value it could have for parents of young boys as well. I believe that this could be a great road map for parents as they train up the young men in their lives and prepare them for the covenantal calling of marriage. Or, how about women and young girls? As a father, I desire that the man my daughter marries be a biblical husband, and one way to help her achieve such a union is to prepare her for what to look for in a potential suitor. Furthermore, in Eve we find that for a woman to be a godly wife, she must act as a “help-mate” to her husband; and it is my opinion that the greatest help a wife can be, is to be ready and willing to call her husband back to a godly standard himself and this book is a great jumping-off point for that endeavor.

In conclusion, “The Christian Husband” by Bob Lepine is a solid read that will challenge the reader without isolating them and has earned a place in my marriage counseling library. I hope that if this is a subject of interest for you that you will take the time to prayerfully consider this work.

Other readings to consider:

From the author: “Love Like You Mean It” “Helping Your Children Know God”

On the subject: “The Masculine Mandate” By Richard D. Phillips

RJ Hesketh, Director of Discipleship & Education

“I don’t need to go to church to be a Christian.” I have heard this statement, or one similar in meaning, countless times. Then there is, “I’m closer to God in my deer stand than I am at church.” And lastly, one of my personal favorites, “I can praise God in my car as easily as I can in a Church.” 

I believe that all of these statements were born out of one simple thing, an overabundance of opportunity when it came to our access to gathering with the Body of Christ. For most of us, our ability to attend church is limited only by our desire to show up. Thus it has become common, and our expectation is that the gathering of the church will always be there for us when “we” are in the mood for it. 

Enter 2020. All of the sudden, across all platforms, the panic bells began to ring, “THEY are going to force churches to remain closed.” 

Everyone was talking about what a shame, a crime, an unholy thing it was that the government would mandate church closures. Pastors with a large amount of global influence began appearing on major news networks speaking out in defiance (and some in agreement) of local and national mandates. My social media accounts began to flood with “if you love Jesus pass this on” messages, and stories of the good ol’ days when the church… (You know a story to put here). 

As I read those posts and those stories, I couldn’t help but wonder just how important it really is for us to meet in person. Was this a case of “you don’t know what you have until it’s gone,” or was this an attitude of “you can’t tell me what to do”? That question very quickly began to change though. It began with asking “how important is the gathering to us,” and became “how important is the gathering to God?”

In Dietrich Bonhoeffer’s book, “Life Together,” I believe we find the answer to both of those questions. 

Written during a time of great separation and persecution (World War II Germany), Bonhoeffer deftly walks us through the importance and value of a life lived together, the necessity of community in the Christian’s walk. With examples both from scripture and his personal experience leading a seminary that was forced underground, he illustrates God’s ideal relational system for the believer. Bonhoeffer contrasts the privilege that is meeting together against the isolation that many of our brothers and sisters have experienced throughout time; bringing to light our status as creatures made for community by a personal and relational God, and demonstrating what effect the lack of that fellowship can have upon the believer.

From shut-ins to exiles, prisoners to those who are called to places where Christians are the vast minority, we see the blessing that is community. How something as seemingly small as a short visit or even a letter, can revitalize us and strengthen our spirits. With each example, Bonhoeffer weaves together the tapestry of God’s ideal for his People -Community. He challenges those of us who have the privilege of getting together to do it often and with great joy, to cherish our time with one another and uplift and encourage each other. Likewise, he admonishes us to feel the absence of those who cannot be with us and therefore reach out to and pray for them.

I will admit, I have had many personal breakthroughs while in a deer stand or while fishing the riffle of a river, and I have settled many debates with myself while in the car; yet nothing (according to scripture as well as experience) can equal the blessing that comes from the gathering of the Body together. If you yourself are uncertain of the importance of regular gatherings or if you find yourself cut off from your fellow believers, this book is for you. It will encourage and challenge, edify and uplift, and it will bring into clear focus our calling to be unified in Christ. I would greatly encourage you to take the hour or so and read “Life Together,” to pray for those who are far away, and to rejoice in those who are near.

As Bonhoeffer writes, “Christian community means community through and in Jesus Christ. On this presupposition rests everything that the Scriptures provide in the way of directions and precepts for the communal life of Christians.” (p24) 

Other suggested reading: 

“The Cost of Discipleship” by Dietrich Bonhoeffer

“Christ the center” by Dietrich Bonhoeffer